Route 16 south is moving slow and I'm both anxious and wary of the start of my seven hour drive home. The traffic inches along this main street as I revisit my latest purchase, a large, antique Kali figurine. I own that mix of thrill and dread; thrill that I will have her in my home to use in my spiritual work, dread at the credit card bill that will need to be defended to my Buddhist spouse.
I take in a breath as my eyes watch the pedestrians swarm this tourist village. Color and textures flock by. Shorts, skirts, sundresses, jeans, a bathing suit with a sarong, and a business suit pass with their various owners. Long hair, short hair and pink hair. Flip flops, cowboy boots, high heels.
I look down at my own capris, dusty from the waterfall hike. I wish I had on the patchwork maxi skirt that I had packed. I take a quick look in the rear view mirror (ah vanity!) and smile at the necklace I had decided needed a good home on a different trip. I'm truly an easy mark for well made unique sterling jewelry, but this pendant had an additional appeal- it housed a spiral seashell. A spiral seashell! How fitting for an earth goddess...
I turn away and then audibly sigh at seeing the capris again. I will definitely change at the next rest area...
And then I am struck by a thought...
Do I really define myself so simply that a skirt and a pendant can make me whole?
Does looking like a hippie goddess girl result in me being spiritual?
I know the answer is no, but damned if I don't stop at that sweet Native American shoppe and buy those silver feather earrings.
After all, a girl needs to look the part, doesn't she?
After all, a girl needs to look the part, doesn't she?
3 comments:
It is so challenging and difficult to separate the need to just be for the desire to be who yourself and others (often unknown) want you to be. It is a daily on going practice of the present moment. In the end, the ego drive, the yearning to be that person, is a never ending path. The goal may be reached but only for a moment. By dropping the ego and the desire, we get to peace within and that is one that lasts forever. Now forgive me, I must go. I have a lot of practice to do....
Is it a matter of looking the part or feeling the part? We have items that make us feel a certain way, so wearing those items can connect us with that feeling. But then, the feeling is not actually in the item, but in the value/meaning we've placed on it. Sometimes it's a good jumpstart into that feeling - to wear a particular item. And it certainly communicates to others, whether it's what we intend to communicate or not. I don't think it's an absurd notion to wear what we want to project, or what we want to feel; but it's never necessary. Besides, I love your skirts and jewelery.
Micha and Pete, thank you for adding your thoughts.
It always rounds out the dialogue to have different views on my words. I greatly appreciate it.
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